How Groovy was 2011? Comics RULE!

I'm not someone that is good at "Best Of" lists at all.  I come across so many things each year that it feels like a mistake to even try to quantify the variety of media experiences against each other.  Instead, here are some of my favorite things that blipped my brain and mangled my mind.  2012 is going to have to step up and bring me some real treats to match this list next year.  First up...some comics memories of the year.



There were a lot of great comics that were released this year, though honestly I find myself looking at collections of older material much more often than the new.  First and foremost I was delighted to finally hold a copy of FLESH AND BLOOD by Robert Tinnell and Neil Vokes.  From personal experience I know these are two good men that love the work they do and have the utmost respect for the heritage of horror cinema and comics.  So, they took the mediums they have both continue to master and slammed them together like true Twins of Evil and concocted a book that works not just as a tribute to Hammer horrors, but continues the films as if they never stopped being produced.  To call it "the film that never was" is a nice thing, but I think this is actually the experience only these two artists could produce.  Pastiche is easy, but creating something familiar AND new out of well used elements takes a special touch.  Tinnell has the pacing down so well that he manages to actually improve upon it thanks to the free flowing sequential art by Vokes that bounces between sexy slurping and right into heavy duty monster battles.  Fans of Hammer will smile as they read, and I would bet that their own imaginations will start to engage as they superimpose their favorite Hammer music atop the story.  I know I was humming my own soundtrack as the line "FRANKENSTEIN MUST BE DESTROYED" finally made it's appearance. 

 Why tread old ground when you can forge new destinies for familiar faces?  Flesh and Blood does it with each page.  Buy this. If you like Hammer you'll love it, if you love horror films you'll be watching the naughtiest Creature Double Feature you never saw on a Saturday afternoon while all the other kids were outside playing baseball. 

Another really great comics release was the first STEVE DITKO OMNIBUS edition from DC.  This jumbo hardcover edition contains the important (to me) SHADE, THE CHANGING MAN in it's entirety (including the Cancelled Comics Cavalcade material), the weird and partially successful though totally interesting STALKER (with Wally Wood) and tons of interesting shorts from all around the DC universe.  From outer space to weird horror, this volume showcases Ditko doing lots of interesting things.  Volume 2 is going to contain Hawk And Dove, a team I have lots of love for.  The reproductions look amazing to me, and finally my copies of Shade don't smell horrid! 

Also awesome this year was a fantastic COMMANDER X-MAS Christmas that features Jay Piscopo's adventure hero in a variety of stories. It is FREE and deserves your attention.  Look for my main monster hero THE HEAP in a cameo as well.  Go HERE and enjoy it for the price of clicking your finger. Best deal ever.

While I love the Warren reprint hardcovers (which I was brought up to date with starting on Father's Day this year) I have to give very special notice to Dark Horse for their extraordinary series of Gold Key reprints.  I've been thrilling to Doctor Spektor and getting my Maciste on with The Mighty Samson, but I'm completely smitten by DAGAR THE INVINCIBLE (Tales of Sword and Sorcery) Volume 1.  With the typically awesome pulp tale telling of Donald Glut, whose name we just spotted on the credits of a Transformers episode, and stunning artwork by Jesse Santos, this is 1972 comics the way I LOVE THEM.  It's action and fantasy and fun in every page.  Santos is actually one of my favorite personal discoveries of the year. I wasn't familiar with his work by name, but I sure am now!  You can read a complete story from the series RIGHT HERE! 

And there was lots more, I'm enjoying THE INFINITE a lot.  Liefeld pouches galore, with an interesting time travel tale by Robert Kirkman has me heading to the shop to get each issue.  THE SPIDER has had a great year with Moonstone Publications including work by Pablo Marcos, Jay Piscopo, Hannibal King and expertly written by Martin Powell.  Transformers UK Classics Volume 1 could be one of my favorite collections in years.  Crossing the UK styled comics of the 80s with the characters I'm enjoying with my son is like having the experience of sharing 2000 ADs early years with a 6 year old boy. 

And then there is this.  When I can afford to get the project off the ground I hope you'll be reading a full length story full of Sleazy Shock, Sapphic Sensuality and Fantastically Trashy fun with The Hong Kong Hell Camp Women.  You can see a comic book trailer in the upcoming AKA book.

And even though it has been utterly demonized, I'm enjoying a few of the new DC books.  OMAC is a bashing and battling blast that isn't the original series, but does tip it's mohawk to Kirby with awesome art by Keith Giffen.  I'm also digging Demon Knights and even the new Suicide Squad book.  The characters look wonky to me (why change Deadshot??)-but I'm enjoying this one as a hard PG-13 level action book that seems happy to revel in big sized action sequences. 
There are tons more--but it's time to move on to the next category! 

Halloween Horrors-Hammered!! #16-30

Well, this is going to be a long blog entry.  My Halloween Horrors got HAMMERED this year, so this post contains 14 different pieces of my October madness.
Hammer and I have a weird relationship.  When I was a young lad, back when televisions had coat hangers attached to them, I was obsessed by Creature Double Feature.  I quit playing baseball as to avoid missing the latest monster film or adventure of Draculatic proportions.  I loved the Dracula movies...but as time went on I left them behind.  While some of you may not appreciate the slasher boom, it was MY time for movies.  I sneaked in to Friday the 13th entries every year and Jason became my Frankenstein-literally in Part 6-and cable TV took away my Saturday ritual.
I loved Dracula, but we just lost touch.  I remembered the skinny face of Peter Cushing from the occasional Frankenstein adventure, which was how I saw most Hammer films. Adventure films. They lacked the gore and oh so forbidden nudity (in the TV prints) that Jason and Freddy would offer me.  They just seemed old and creaky by comparison.  Herbert West (who I'll get to later) was Dr. Frankenstein for me.
So, I was inspired this year.  I'm particularly proud of the achievements of my friends Neil Vokes and Bob Tinnell as they unleash FLESH AND BLOOD on the world.  It is a Hammer inspired bit of Sequential Cinema that I've long waited to enjoy.  But...well...I found that my appreciation for it as a comic book was deep, but I was not really skilled enough in the ways of what they were referencing to truly get it.
And when I want to get something it gets got. With obsessive desire to understand I looked squarely at the Obsessive Science Monster-FRANKENSTEIN.  Watched all of them.  Then moved on. And on.  Groovy negligee.  Buoyant breasts. Blood and Beards.  Hammer.  I need to get a printed copy of Flesh and Blood. I need a flashlight. I need to get under the covers of my bed.
I'm HAMMERED now and it won't stop.  Inspiration comes from odd places sometimes, and it is best when it is from the success of your pals.
I originally planned to write individual reviews, but again I felt under qualified to really add anything to the mountain of study that has been put forward on these films.  Not a lack of confidence really, just not sure what I can give.  So, here are my quick thoughts.  Nothing deep, but an unskilled look at a small splattering of Hammer Horror.  I told my friend Bob Sargent that "these Hammer guys take their films fucking serious, man" and I meant it.  So, use the lens of cinematic love that colors all my writing on this blog and enjoy some observations on my viewings. They will probably be re-watched in coming years-I can't wait to read what I thought "back when I re-discovered Hammer for myself." 

Curse of Frankenstein was my first foray into this new Hammer period in my cinematic trip and I loved it.  Christopher Lee hits a grand slam and gives a stunning performance as the monster-I didn't even realize it was him!!  The Baron is a nutcase, but likeable in an obsesso-wacko kind of way. I was really struck by this being made when it was and how it stacked up to the monsters from Roger Corman and crew. This was an entirely different ballgame!  Terence Fisher puts so much visual style to the world that the soap opera "But I love you!" sequences fall by the wayside as I was marveling at how much weight the bandaged monster body seemed to be carrying.  And that monster!!!  Wow! WOW!  Hazel Court is great in what could have been a simple Screaming Mimi role as well.
As an 80s kid I have to say this one reminded me tons of Re-Animator (yes, I know it is the other way around of course).  With the re-animation of the animal. The co-conspirator repulsed by the actions of the mad scientist and the beautiful lady.  See, Hammer already made me appreciate how much it has done already. 

Revenge of Frankenstein was a let down.  I am certain a repeat viewing would help now because it definitely fits well as Frankenstein escapes the blade of justice to rename himself Dr. Stein (hah..creative fellow) and get cracking at the dead tissue and solving that whole unlife problem.  The biggest upside was the look of the film and it's setting up Frankenstein as a Science Adventurer that seems to have more than a few morality issues.  I really liked the entire bit of business involving the Doctors Union trying to bring Dr. Stein in to line!  Hah, you can't tame Frankenstein and it really sets a very original character in motion for Hammer.  Cushing puts the arrogance of the Doc, which always seems to lead to his folly, across with little motions so well that I completely got the character from here on out.  He doesn't have time for you, he has things to do!!

Frankenstein Created Woman was what I watched next and this is where it totally took off for me.  What an incredible film!!  There isn't an ugly shot in the entire movie, and it has a bunch of relentlessly creative elements sprinkled atop the atypical plot of a beautiful woman containing two souls-one of which is bent on vengeance. The SOUL EXTRACTOR and the ideas that power it are easily the things I'll take away from the series.  Not content just to play with flesh anymore, the Baron goes straight to the ethereal here.  The only odd complaint I had was that the three naughty ne'er do wells that need to die are seemingly done in reverse order.  I bet there is a reason, but I can't see it yet.  The worst (and most awesome) of the batch is Anton, played by Peter Blythe, is dispatched and I really didn't care about the others-which dampened the climax.  Ah well...I also became a big fan of Thorley Walters with this one. He is just fun to watch.  This is probably the film I'd pick to show new Hammer viewers a Frankenstein film if I had to pick one.

Frankenstein Must Be Destroyed is almost as awesome as Woman, if not a dead tie.  Cushing gets to ride the insanity coaster over the edge as now Frankenstein crosses not only the lines of good taste in dead bodies, but even presses the live flesh of Veronica Carlson as he breaks a completely different moral code.  As I watched along in the series this one was probably the most disturbing and interesting for me.  Frankenstein is blackmailing a young doctor and his fiancee (over coke smuggling!) into assisting him as he jams the brain of a colleague into a new body in order to find out what the man knew when he died.  It blows up in his face though, because the Monster is more man than Frankenstein at this point, and he/it tries to settle his worldly affairs with compassion (as opposed to the Doc who keeps around Anna to make coffee) and methodically attacks and tries to destroy Frankenstein.  You want to root against the Baron? This is the one to do it with.
Bonus note, this is the movie that made me question Peter Cushing and Hammer's choice of footwear.  Jeez, in the opening scene the little shoes made me think it was a prostitute wandering the streets, not Frankensteena Ballerina!  Now when I rewatch these I'll be obsessing over feet!

Evil of Frankenstein was one I missed in it's proper viewing space, and I really enjoyed it. NOTHING like the others, this is Hammer Road taking a short cut through Universal Way.  It doesn't match, Cushing tries to sell this more...pathetic...Frankenstein.  Why me...boo hoo...dead flesh...boo hoo.  But it does feature an awesome Box Head Beast of a monster and some wickedly wonderful sets.  I really loved the scene of the monster in the ice.  Dr. Franck. Dr. Stein.  Fah, having the Baron meet up with his creation as randomly as he does here is a great stretch of believability!  Yeah, it's fun and for folks with Comcast HD it was on for free On Demand. GREAT print too.
This movie did make me appreciate the remainder of the series, especially ...Woman.  After trying to play nice with established Frankestein-ia it seems the Hammer crew was charged up to do something much more unique.  They succeeded and while this one will probably stay more a footnote to the series than a beloved classic, it belongs in a way that shows what could have been done if less effort, and unique minds, had made these films.

Frankenstein and the Monster from Hell is a trash film epic.  We have mouth to vein, brain dropping fun all around. Frankenstein gets another young couple to help him as he turns the table on the administrator of an asylum and takes over for his own twisted experiments.  Cushing has gone around the bend here with Frankenstein. He looks gaunt and tired (which is pointed out in the dialog at points) and builds up a giant of a Neanderthal styled mega monster with a heart.  Frankenstein has lost all perspective. I almost dropped over laughing when Cushing casually tosses out the lines about getting the creature to procreate "the usual way!"  Just...wow.  Total entertainment and a bittersweet ending as the Doctor remains unbowed by his massive failure, ready to roll on.
I wish they had rolled on.

Horror of Dracula was my first Dracula in several decades and again, I was blown away by the production and quality of it!  Lee is Dracula and having him pursued  by Cushing as Van Helsing is just too much fun. The entire cast is game, I loved seeing Micheal Gough as the straight man to all the bizarre goings on.  There are a few little bits that were off however.  I thought John Van Eyssen was pretty wobbly as Jonathan Harker. It seems like the script had him in the know about Dracula's evil powers right up front. And then...he just stands around, unhip to the fictional script.  The opening scenes of this film are fantastic, but this performance didn't work for me at all.  Not that it matters much in the longer scheme of the film of course.  I have to say though, THIS is a horror movie to me.  Even though I'm in on the mystery of the monster (as audiences were even upon release), Lee creates elements of mystery to his performance that I want to look at again and again.

Countess Dracula knocked my socks off.  It felt like a dirty fairy tale with Ingrid Pitt getting naked and scrubby bubbly with blood.  There is romance. There is intrigue. There are the truly OO-ER MISSUS breasts of Andrea Lawrence to adore!  I was totally absorbed by this film, it was fun to watch Nigel Green try to keep up with the aging Countess. The man just wanted a little action lady...this all could have been avoided.  A must see in my opinion.
Flesh and Blood note: The mighty BEARD of Dobi is so very Vokes to me it is beyond belief.  That was some frickin' work I'd wager.
This film may also contain some of the fastest "falling in loves" ever.
Ever.

Twins of Evil led me to realize that the Karnstein Trilogy was going to be MY Hammer.  I don't even know how to summarize it briefly, but this is a busty and lusty little fantasy film that features vigilantes against vampires and ample twins all over the screen.  The plot is so simple. Two girls, twins...a vampire in the woods. One girl is naughty and the other nice.  Finally, one is evil, the other...not so evil, but in the line of fire (literally) from fearful villagers.  I love this film.  I have to say, it wasn't until later that I learned that this was the final Karnstein entry. It is pretty much divorced from the others outside of the busty lusty bits and stands tall on it's own.
Favorite line has to be Karnstein by the inverted burning hot crucifix rubbing up his naughty twin and saying "for you...all pleasure shall be supreme!"  I mean, is that not Sex Monster 101 or what?? BRILLIANT!!!

Scars of Dracula contains my favorite image of the Hammer experiment, Christopher Lee punishing his man servant (Doctor Who??) with a burning sword is incredible.  While it is in dire need of proper bats on strings, Scars piles on the gore and is one of the most entertaining of the lot so far.  Jenny Hanley from The Flesh and Blood Show gives me proper stake wood, so we are already in good stead Scars, but what really jumped out at me was that this has many elements of the original novel that weren't present in Horror of Dracula!  And Dracula is a sadistic badass, he seems less interested in pursuing his prey than outright devouring it and moving forward for more more more gore!  Also, is it me or does Dracula get easier to revive, but grander in the way he does it here.  From start to finish this is a ton of fun.  Lightning??  YEAH!

Satanic Rites of Dracula is an oddball, it didn't feel like a Hammer film to me, more like a cheaper knock off one-using the same stars.  It features a Psyhomania styled gang of vampiric thrall toughs, a little groovy "what the hell kind of law enforcement branch is this" tele-thrill and Christopher Lee giving a very very odd performance as D.D.Denham.  What, Dr. Franck and Dr. Stein were out of town? 
But you know what I like best---this is a TRASH FILM!!  We have goofy Dracula and some naked chained vampire women (whose discovery by our heroes is a real highlight) AND we have Peter Cushing chainsmoking and looking gaunt and unsure as a descendant of Van Helsing.  When the evil plot of BUBONIC PLAGUE is revealed I was excited to see Dracula the World Killer idea, but it plays out even better as we witness bubbling flesh of those that would serve Dracula. 
I like this better than A.D. 72 because it dispenses of groove and keeps 70s grime and grit!

Vampire Circus is awesome, I know this from a viewing back when the Carlton DVD was released.  There are a shedload of groovy images coming out of the beast people angle and the amazing performance from the lead gypsy woman of course, but the story and how original it is amongst vampire films really makes it a must watch.  From the Plague Borders and the adventuring in relation to that, the lustful villagers falling prey to animal desire and my favorite Thorley Walters moment to date as the ridiculous bumpkin Burgermeister finds himself in a mirror ball of amusement and mayhem!  If you haven't seen this, or are as inexperienced with Hammer as myself-it is a great place to start and see a bunch of sides to the output.  A little stagey, full of great images and trashy spectacle, this is a circus you'll be ready to climb into the clown car with.

The Vampire Lovers.  The Vampire Lovers. YES!!  Busts. Busts. BUSTS!!!  Bites. Bites. BITES!!  The saga of Mircalla Karnstein is a full throttle bit of sex and violence cinema that manages to satisfy the junk cinema fan, but tosses in unique flavors at every turn.  OK, I like the women-we can probably all agree on that. But what I can't stop thinking about is Ingrid Pitt and her portrayal of the doomed sex monster.  The character does a lot of things for a lot of different motivations, but with this performance she keeps it all straight (probably the straightest thing in the film) for us.  I wanted her to win?  Go figure.

The opening segments are also really interesting, very stylish and it got me right into feeling the unique funk these Karnstein flicks are laying down.  From the lascvious monster to the lewd lady of the house right on up to the dagger crosses and teleporting nighties-I'm digging it. Also, I have decided that Madeline Smith can use her stunning lung power to make me feel rather uncomfortable.
Thankfully, she does it in a nightie. What else?

Lust For A Vampire was my "Gotta get to it" flick for the month and I did!  I'm so glad...first and foremost, I like this Mike Raven guy.  He has a great vampire look going, he may have swiped THE Count's cape and stuff, but he is cool.  COOL!  Well, dead cold I guess.  Anyway.  Yutte Stensgaard is easy on the eyes and again we have the awesomely revived Mircalla / Carmilla saga underway. But wait. It's a girls finishing school. Were bare breasted neck rubbing is totally cool.  And ya know...just being a writer and hanging around is good enough to fall in love with, and solve, a vampire mystery.  Cool.  Great bit of toady prostrates himself before beautiful vampire and pays big price scene too.  Loaded with Lust and Shivering with Stakes-this is a blast and if I'd seen this, uncut, as a lad I'd be one of those guys that takes his Hammer to bed and pounds out a few.  HOLY CRAP.  Great bit with a cross being absorbed into vampire cleavage so deep...so wonderful...that it takes a bit before the wicked woman can make the 'rut roh face! 
I need to return to the Karnstein trilogy in a few months and watch them again.

Well, there we have a bunch of Hammer films that I enjoyed watching. I can't wait to read Flesh and Blood again and appreciate not only what it is, but what it springs from and pays proper tribute to.  The hours of viewing were fun and I know they will pay off. 

Hammer TIME!

Halloween Horrors 8-The Devil's Men / Land of the Minotaur

Those who enter the forbidden chamber of the minotaur must die..die..die...

I had no idea that I was going to get to see the gore n' nudity edition of Land of the Minotaur, a title I've always been intrigued by, completely by accident.  Years ago I traded for the UK disc of THE DEVIL'S MEN and it sounded like a good title to watch during October.  Now, this is not a film with an excellent reputation, but I found it to be great fun, like watching a Charlton comic book picked up at a Woolworths for a dime-and it comes packed with a Brian Eno flexi disc of spooky slashsawing to boot!  Peter Cushing glowers, there are tons of sexy hotpants and tight shirts bits and you even get titles that are exhaled by a fire blowing stone minotaur!!  Bonus!

Director Kostas Karagiannis may not have a great handle on fast paced action, but he does throw us square in the middle of sinister goings on and keeps interest high for the wandering eyes by adding in some lovely nude ladies on occasion.  It really helps that we have a multicolored rainbow of cultists doing a groovy sacrifice sequence to get us started.  We know trouble is afoot, and trouble has a hepcat tailor!

After Father Roche (Donald Pleasance) warns some nice young folks not to go poking around some ruins, they do and end up on the receiving end of the Cults wrath.  Roche calls his pal, and apparent monster smasher, Milo Kaye (Kostas Karagiorgis) into action.  One of the girlfriends of the missing lads also arrives, to keep the skin quotient high!  Luan Peters looks like a Tom Sutton woman in action as the girl on the scene, one that seems to get left behind a lot actually, and shimmies and screams her way through the role with great gusto.  Of course, the cultists begin to attack and there are several chases that lead to Peters getting smacked around as a silly girl by the hero (yeesh)--but it all falls in to place as the sinister Carpathian, Baron Corofax, steps up the game and is looking for more sacrifices.  It helps that Peter Cushing plays the Baron, though for this writer I must admit that I've seen so many Neil Vokes images of Cushing that the man looks more like a moving comic character to me than the other way around.  

While it is far from perfect, there is a lot of fun landscaping to be done in this Land of the Minotaur.  The costumes are utterly cool and the night time stalking and prowling cultists are exceptionally spooky, and when the final trio of intrepid minotaur hunters are wandering the ruins and descending down the caves it has a great spooky feel.  That atmosphere is undercut a bit by the silly leads, though I take that as a positive as I couldn't help but smile and think of all the great covers and stories from Charlton Comics MONSTER HUNTERS as I watched them wander around and come face to face with fire, exploding statues, Peter Cushing and even some exploding cultists!  There are showers and slapping and a whole lot of yapping here, but hey...it's alright because I still enjoyed every minute of it.  

A nice Saturday Afternoon spooky, with some extra breasts and booty--I like this flick, and if you find it in the longer print, I'd recommend it.  It was released by Crown International with a PG rating, so I'll assume that there is a less bloody and breasterific edition out on US DVD-which is a shame.  While I wouldn't climb a Kraken to find it, I would recommend the hunt.  Fans of cool soundtracks will enjoy the Brian Eno scraping and tingling for sure, but for me...the end credits song is one of the BEST 70s vocal horror themes I've heard.  I NEED IT!

Now THAT is a trio of Monster Hunters!

Halloween Horrors 3 -Caltiki The Immortal Monster

Caltiki is one of my favorite black and white monster films, and I'm happy to say that it works just as well in 2010 as it does in 1959.  While it is not the most unique monster film you'll ever see, given that we have 51 years of cinema between here and there, it has interesting characters, a groovy monster given life by MARIE FOAM (Mario Bava never had a better name, not even John Old beats this), outdated cultural bits about the proper behavior of men and women and a psycho performance from Gerard Herter as the chomped and evilly altered Max.

Quickly put, Caltiki is an ancient god monster that is discovered by a team of archeolgists by accident. Of course, there are signs that things are going to go sour here.  We have love quadrangles that include some really screwed up interpersonal politics, jealousy, jutting bosoms and square jaws and even better, a dopey member of the crew spies on a superb bit of native dancing.  All that nets our spy, who is warned that it is bad mojo to do so, is being derezzed by Caltiki in a rather shocking manner!  After scummy and lusting Max gets attacked by Caltiki our hero John (John Merivale) does the sensible thing. Bring the blob to his house (with his wife and child) and try to see if Gamma Rays do anything to it. In a Pre-Hulk world, I guess nobody would know what can happen!  Max goes nuts!  Stalking! Blobbish Devouring!! More Jutting Bosoms!! 

Directed by Ricardo Freda and with cinematography and effects (and some direction) by Mario Bava, this is an outstandingly presented chiller that manages to mix the subtle and spooky with the sudsy burbling blobboid frolics.  The underwater sequence that leads to the "skeleton in the suit" reveal still gets me sucked in faster than you can say Mexican Monster Devours Max (see image below) and I'm in awe of how much comic book frame perfection there is in some shots.  I'd love to see this adapted by Neil Vokes in inkwash someday, there are even a few Bobby T haircuts to use!  It's been said before, and I'll say it once more. CALTIKI is a rockin' blob that will delight any monster fan.  Get it. Love it!

Meme about Me Me Me...An Image Gallery

I was tagged by Neil at the excellent THE AGITATION OF THE MIND to participate in a very cool meme making the rounds online.  Now, I'm quite horrible at focusing on any one thing in particular when it comes to this blog, so I had to do some pondering.  I've pondered and twisted around a bunch of ideas-and came to the perfect cheat (of sorts) that befits the subtitle of this blog.  But first...the fun rev up the meme requires.  Is it me, or am I ridiculously hambrained when it comes to these things, but I find all this stuff more challenging than the actual blogging.

OK...so the idea, or remit, comes from THE DANCING IMAGE!  It was furthered by CHECKING ON MY SAUSAGES (what a great name!!)  The tagged are to share “a gallery of images chosen by you to stand for so much of what makes Cinema such a rich and exciting medium.”  Yep, gimme a loaded gun why don't you?  I love cinema, I love movies, I love flicks and I really really love TRASH.

I don't know if I've made this point on the blog before, but to me, when I say TRASH CINEMA I mean it lovingly. Yes, I was warped and embraced by Craig Ledbetter's EUROPEAN TRASH CINEMA and co-opted the term in to my private lexicon at that point. The TRASH in cinema is that which we used and crumpled up upon consumption.  A fast food to feed whatever bit of the imagination that brought me to the film I'm watching.  I also love the term because it lets me take a leveler to the playing field when I sit down to watch an Argento film, a Mario Bianchi sexploitation film, Transformers 2, a Koji Wakamatsu film, a Jess Franco shot on video Frankenstein film, an episode of Thundarr The Barbarian, Sasha Grey getting banged (seriously, only term to use) by a guy in a bear suit, Cannibal Holocaust or a pornographic film made by Alberto Cavallone that takes a midget and a trans-sexual maniac into a villa to make snuff films.  Ah, Baron Corvo, you blow my mind...  The media enters my head, I mangle it up and out comes the trash.  I have a big trashbin by the way...each element is equal.  Make no mistake, I'm not being lofty here, just honest.  Your mileage may vary, and I've certainly had many people question my critical faculties over the years, but for me, the movies and the media are part of the way I live-I can only do it this way.  Karate Warrior 6 stands shoulder to shoulder with Alphaville for my 90 minutes.

Back to business.  The rules:

1. Pick as many pictures as you want - but make them screencaps. These need to be moments that speak to you that perhaps haven't been represented as stills before.
Can do!

3. You MUST link to the original gallery at Checking On My Sausages and the gallery at The Dancing Image.  See above.

4. Tag five blogs.
OK...I'd like to see a few more of these from my blogging cohorts.  I'm tagging the following.
Exploitation Retrospect!!
Ballistic Blood Bullets!!
That's All, Vokes!!
Ninja Dixon!!
Cinema Arcana!!



2. Pick a theme, any theme.
Oh, I had a few...I ran through ERIC FALK COCK (a series of male nude images from European Trash Cinema to compliment my Casual (un)Dress Friday-with tribute to one of my favorite "Yodar Danglers"tm Bob Sargent),  HARASSED HEROISM (beaten heroes, Spaghetti Westerns would be easy pickings), MY MONSTER MANIA (a tribute to rubber suits) and LINA LICKING (well, I do love Lina Romay and you can imagine what that would have entailed).  No joke, these topics all suggest the primal joy of cinema to me.
But then it hit me, I suck at meme work!  I yabber on and on about films and things on this blog, so why not some more.  So my topic is called NECK SNAPPING CINE-MOMENTS! 
You would have to actually watch a few films with me to notice it, but when something pierces my brain shell I have a weird little tic that I notice. My shoulders drop, my neck cocks backwards and I can feel my face react really strongly, be it with a smile or grimace or other unseemly contortion.  I don't know if this is an emotional reaction exactly, but it is exactly why I load up Alfonso Brescia movies. I'm always looking for that feeling and nothing makes me happier--I may be titillated, shocked, surprised or amused, but I'm getting a genuine reaction.  And that is good.   My days are full of responsibility and *choke* thoughtful work...I don't have lots of time to be entertained, and these images are the ones that did it.

Some will probably be shocking, some may be funny and some may leave you stunned by their apparent emptiness of entertainment. But I see something there...I'm looking forward to going along on this ride through the things that my own mental dumpster still contains.  Just be ready for Eric Falk Nude Kung Fu saddling up to Godzilla movies and faux spiders!

And I'm cheating EVEN MORE...because this is a fun subject for me I'm going to present just a few here and then continue with these.  My only "rule" is that I tell you what I'm seeing.You'll scratch your head, you'll laugh or you'll click away screaming (because here comes BARON CORVO).  Lets see what I find.

Sounds a bit self indulgent, and I'd like to apologize to my fellow MemeOTrons if so...but cinematic richness is a'comin!!


So here are three Neck Snapping CineMoments...

Not only is Andrea Bianchi's BURIAL GROUND a fantastic and wacked out slab of Zombie Trash Cinema, but it includes some incredibly cool moments!  This "Profecy" is a great finale-and includes TWO typos!!  So, I read it and say WOW that is cool. And then I read it again and wonder how the hell NIGTHS made it through.  "Profecy" is bad, but Nights is just wrong!

"Bad chop suey...so long!"  Pieces could dominate this list-for there are few more joyful Trash Cinema experiences available to us.  But a Bruce Lee clone, who certainly had a history with producer Dick Randall, popping up in a Chainsaw Charley chopping classic is incredible.  And wait...he attacks the female lead in KUNG FU TERRORVISION...gets his ass kicked by Susan George (woah, what happened Bruce #2??) and then blames bad Chinese take-out food?   DAMN!

This image from Bo Arne Vibenius' sadly obscure follow up to Thriller-A Cruel Picture, Breaking Point, is an utterly amazing moment in a film full of vile and evil behavior.  I wrote a review of sorts for the film here (part 1 and part 2 )-and while Breaking Point features lots of strange visuals, this moment when our frustrated hero takes out his vengeance against not just the people in the film, but the viewer as well, is just fantastic.  Vibenius was frustrated with nearly everything in his film career at this point, and this image is a perfect portrait of the artist shooting the film right in to my memory.  Forever.  More is certain to come from this film.

Neil Vokes pays tribute to Paul Naschy

Neil Vokes' artwork is no stranger to this blog, and when he took up the task of paying tribute to Paul Naschy I had high hopes.  As usual he surpassed even my expectations!  Check this great Daninsky out...and for even MORE images, go to his blog right here.  THAT'S ALL VOKES!

Morpho Just Got Kreativ (tm)

I was really pleased to receive a Kreativ Blogger award from Paul at the always awesome BALLISTIC BLOOD BULLETS...a good friend, my Tough To Kill Collaborator and a guy that always inspires me to watch things explode on my television screen.  And those exploding huts always make me think of Paul as the monarch of Castle Banzai-laughing and enjoying the same thrill of bashing bamboo to bits as our onscreen heroes.  Thank ya sir...
And then, another Kreativ Blogger Award arrived!  Thanks to Holger at Hammer and Beyond I'm blushing from all this attention!  You won't find a better source of Hammer fun and a whole lot more-check it out!  Holger is also the Kingpin of Krimi at Eurotrash Paradise!
And hey...there is ANOTHER award that has landed at my virtual door, but I'll do that as a separate post.  
So, what does THIS logo entail?  The rules are as follow...


These are rules associated with the award:

1. Thank the person who nominated you for this award.  Check...Check....
2. Copy the logo and place it on your blog.  Check...
3. Link to the person who nominated you for this award.  Check...
4. Name 7 things about yourself that people might find interesting.  Below the cool links...
5. Nominate 7 Kreativ Bloggers. Done
6. Post links to the 7 blogs you nominate. Done
7. Leave a comment on each of the blogs letting them know they have been nominated-  On the way...


Seven great blogs?  Easy-I won't link the ones that gave me the award, but they are above and would be on the list!


1. Ade Salmon Art - The homepage of artist extraordinaire Adrian Salmon, you can see some of his work on my blog, and keep up to date with all of his amazing feats of angular artistry at this amazing page.
2. That's All, Vokes - another artist blog, Neil puts new art and works in progress up for you to enjoy!  Check out the Zombie Bomb story while you are there...
3. Maciste and Friends is an excellent images blog that features a ton of cool Peplum and adventure VHS covers. One of the spots I really hope updates while I have my morning coffee.
4. When the Vietnam War raged...in the Philippines - This EuroAction blog is an essential stop for anyone that loves movies with burning bamboo, exploding bad guys or always wanted to be that American guy that stayed behind, got fat and rich and runs a gambling casino in the 'Nam.  I love it.
5. Giallo Fever - This is always an interesting blog, covering cool trash from a far more critical position than I usually take (though honestly, my take is based on "what explodes, how many breasts, is there a midget sidekick")-and gets me thinking as well as shopping for movies I may have missed.
6. Love Train for the Tenebrous Empire - ALWAYS a fun stop for your morning trashy film information and reviews. Anyone that would give Mickey Hargitay an award for his over the top performance in Bloody Pit of Horror is my kind of person!
7.Ninja Dixon - Fred is a one of a kind guy...a Swedish Shinobi of Stunning Stealth, an action afficianado and an all around great guy. Also, he dances like nobody else could in Camp Slaughter.  Go to :35 seconds in to the trailer and you will believe!!

FREDZILLA DANCES and I DELIGHT IN EVERY MOMENT!

 
Now then, I don't think I'm particularly intriguing, but here are the seven items I'll put about myself.

-I traveled to Sweden to meet with Bo Arne Vibenius and assisted in purchasing the world wide rights to one of my favorite films, Thriller-A Cruel Picture.  I flew over first class and had, with the head of Chrome Entertainment, a LOT of Swedish Paper Currency in my socks.  Seriously. Socks.

-I am an at home dad and every day I make in to a Maciste like adventure to keep things fun for me and the kids. 

-This blog has over 500 posts, and after finding a bunch of files from my previous website I realized that I have written a lot of stuff about the movies I love.  I hope my kids read this someday and think I am a total geek.

-I never ever saw one penny from the Thriller/One Eye project, but did get scary threats from the director-whom I still really like and love his movies.  In related matters, this was the only time I've had an email signed "BOO-YAR!"

-I saw Dawn of the Dead in it's first run, in a theater, at midnight...when I was 9!  Yeah... parental lesson learned.

-I met my wife in Oberlin, OH-a legendary place to any fanzine fan-and also met the master of MONSTER! himself that weekend, Tim Paxton.  Funny how much Eurotrash films have shaped my life.

-...and then she allowed me to have the entire score to Vampyros Lesbos play for our wedding reception.  Note, she would rather pull out her own eyeballs than watch a Jess Franco film.

Thanks for the award folks...and now everyone should go visit the awesome links and enjoy some European Trash Cinema!

Even more old graphics in the new New Year!

Yes indeed..there is Lina Romay...again!  Part 2 of my decade of recovered images has begun. If you missed Part 1, you can start there.  The above was done for GASP ETC. some time back and the article is also on this blog. 
Then we have 3 images for Bruce Holecheck. He has started his blogging adventures, but years ago he came to me with the name CINEMUCK. This is what I made of it.

 

 

I've also done a good number of images for The Eurotrash Paradise, a group started by Bob "Videooze" Sargent and Neil "Sifu of all things artistic" Vokes.  The Gravy Sweats one...ya had to be there.

 

And then there was another CineXtremist column that went unpublished...

And here is the Australian Tour Edition signature sheet for TOUGH TO KILL.  These are the only books that actually have both Paul and I signing them. I don't even have one! 

And here are some GREAT early graphics by Vince Corkadel!

 

And finally, the "web serial" that never happened those many moons ago, THE MAGNIFICENT SHADOW FIGHTERS.  The art here is from the pitch for Indie Gods Publications.  Art by Cristian Alaminos-it never happened due to some scheduling problems-though I would still LOVE to do this story and dedicate it to old school Tomb of DVD icon, Sifu Linn Haynes.  He loved the pitch that had a team of relentless video hunters operating out of a shop owned by a real life crew of ninja.  Ah...someday.